Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Noisy Sex

It's been a busy several days. I finished up my Christmas shopping, hung some pictures in the condo, and had my monitor catch fire (no damage to the house or anything, just some sparking and smoke wafting out of the case). Glad I asked for a new flat panel LCD for Christmas, and thanks to my Dad who just retired and had an extra monitor in the garage I could borrow.

Anyway, after passing out in front of the TV tonight, I wanted to try and catch up on the blogging world, see how Jaxia's "Action's On You" post was going, see how the WWdN:Bonus Code IGGY tournament went, and see how Lady Falcon's Rules of the Suck Out were coming. As I'm scanning the screen, I hear the bed of my upstairs hottie neighbor creaking away. With her last boyfriend, she was quite the moaner, and he seemed to do a good job of lasting for a while. I hadn't really heard anything since the new guy moved in a month ago or so. He seemed to finish rather quickly. I could hear some moaning, but the creaking ended much more quickly than I would have thought. Now, I don't claim to be a marathon runner, but I certainly do more than a 40 yard dash!

Now, some of the more experienced bloggers may be able to time-share their brains and such better than I can, but it was hard to concentrate on the poker while listening to the new guy upstairs playing poke-her with my neighbor! The activity upstairs got me to thinking about past noisy "events". Back when I lived in Costa Mesa, just outside of Newport Beach, I had this scaldingly hot pair of neighbors that I would have given first my left nut and then the right to do. They both had boyfriends, but Jesus were they hot. One summer night, I brought a hook up home. She was quite "enthusiastic" in bed. I didn't really think about it until we were well into the art of fucking, but I had left the bedroom window open! After we finished and took a shower, I walked her out to her car (yes, she went home! I've got a better story on that topic, but that will remain for another post). As I walk back to my front door, both of the hotties are out in the patio, having a drink and a smoke. One of them said "good job", and the other just gave me the golf clap! Suffice to say, I was rather pleased with that, and left them to think about what they were missing.

Now the question...who has a story about being overheard during a naughty encounter. I'm not really talking about being walked in on, or having a cop come up to your car while you're giving/receiving a hummer. I'm talking about a roomie (especially of the opposite sex) hearing thru the wall or door, or a neighbor hearing you go at it, and being called out for it the next day. I swear, I started writing about poker, but the love monkeys upstairs got me off topic. The next one will be more appropriate, I swear. Or not. We'll see...

5 comments:

River Driver said...

I'm sure you don't want to hear stories from me...

HighOnPoker said...

I'm actually well versed in the art of Ninja Sex. It involves having sex in near silence. I've harnessed the chi of the bedroom to flow with the creaks of the bed. It's particularly helpful if you don't want your date's family to wake up. It's even more helpful if you don't want your "date" to wake up.

That said, I have had experiences involving headboards in college that left my neighbors thinking that I was putting up a gallery of paintings.

MusikMom said...

I miss the 'good old days' of LOUD sex. I have two young kids now so that area of my life now suffers.
A couple of things:
1. My roommates' nickname for me? Moan-a. (Long for Mona.) Enuf said.
2. Our neighbors upstairs are loud too. I've been trying to figure out who the heck lives up there and the bed is REALLY creaky! One day the 5 yr old asked what was going on and very matter of factly I said, "Their dishwasher is very loud." I had no excuse for the screaming girlfriend. I was just hoping that my daughter wouldn't mention it.

MusikMom said...

That was Moan-a in college. My hubby would FREAK if I told him that!

iamhoff said...

Moan-a,

Fortunately, I don't have to deal with the kids yet...I've heard plenty of stories on that topic, though, from my many friends with kids. You'd think that somebody would come up with some sort of cartoon/show DVD thing along the lines of whatever's popular now (Dora? The Wiggles? Bob the Builder? Jeez, I spend more time than I thought around Troll's kids!) that has the kids or whatever jumping around and singing or screaming in such a way as to either cover the parental noises or give parents an easy explanation to cover their amorous noise. "No, mommy and daddy were just playing games like the Boobies (rofl, couldn't resist) show you and your sister watch." If somebody came up with that, they'd probably make a lot of money.